SBM Blog

The Latest of The Onion For Lawyers

Justice Breyer Unable To Look At Anything Without Deliberating Constitutionality Of It

Court Orders Amazon.com To Adopt Bankrupt Bookstores' Cats

The Onion Update

Some of you may be wondering why we haven't had a "The Onion for Lawyers" post in a while. What with The Onion's propensity for using the f-word in most headlines and an apparent disinterest in legal issues, pickings have been slim. To tide you over, here are a few non-legal but PG-rated items from the latest edition:

• Report: Every Potential 2040 President Already Unelectable Due To Facebook
• Human Feet Originally Used For Walking, Anthropologists Report
• Empty Snapple Bottle Finally Rolls Out Bus Door
• Study Finds No Logical Reason Why Planes Fly

The Latest of The Onion for Lawyers

Court Rules Meryl Streep Unable To Be Tried By Jury As She Has No Peers

Scalia Recuses Self From Capital Murder Case, Citing Double Homicide He Committed in '80s

Irrelevant Holiday Bonus: More Vegetables Evolving Chocolate-Sauce-Filled Centers As Evolutionary Imperative

The Onion for Patent Lawyers

Charmin Introduces New Disposable Toilet Paper

The Onion: Not Just for Lawyers

Scientists Trace Heat Wave To Massive Star At Center Of Solar System

The Latest of The Onion for Lawyers

Emergency Team Of 8th-Grade Civics Teachers Dispatched To Washington

The Latest of The Onion for Lawyers

Recording Statistics: An Invasion Of Players' Privacy?

Pfizer Breaks Psychological Need To Always Seek FDA's Approval

Predator Drone TR425 Takes The Stand

The Latest of The Onion for Lawyers

U.S. To Just Hand Terry Jones Over To Fundamentalist Muslims

Juror Brings Baseball Glove To Barry Bonds Perjury Trial

International Criminal Court Announces New '3 Strikes' Genocide Policy

The Latest of The Onion for Lawyers

Struggling Supreme Court Loses Eighth Consecutive Case

Incomprehensible Shouting Named Official U.S. Language

Jury Selection Proving Difficult In Trial Of 'The Jury Killer'

Finding the Humor in Corporate Personhood and Citizens United

Chief Justice John Roberts goes there:

The protection in FOIA against disclosure of law enforcement information on the ground that it would constitute an unwarranted invasion of personal privacy does not extend to corporations. We trust that AT&T will not take it personally.

From Monday's decision in FCC v AT&T.  Download it here.

HT: Slate, "The verdict is in: Chief Justice John Roberts is hilarious."